F.A.Q's

Please click on the desired question to jump to the answer.

Religious Life and Vows:

I recall seeing Sisters in habits. Why don't you wear one anymore?

What are apostolic religious orders?

How do you know if you can join the Sisters of St. Joseph?

What is the difference between a Sister and a Nun?

What kind of relationships do Sisters have with men?

Why do some Sisters leave religious life after many years?

Why don't Sisters say Mass or become priests?

How does a person choose the congregation to join?

What is a vow?

Why do you make vows?

Where do Sisters get the money to travel?

Can you join if you are a lesbian?

How old do you have to be to be a Sister?

How did you know you wanted to be a Sister?

How long does it take to become a Sister?

I feel called to be a Sister but I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I get sick more often but it is not life threatening and I continue a normal life. Will any religious order let me join them?

Can someone who is entering a religious community also be engaged in studies at university at the same time?

Can a person who in her past has made many wrong choices, e.g., used illegal drugs, still enter a religious community?

Community Life:

How much contact does a Sister have with her family?

What does it mean to live in community?

If I join, may I bring my dog or other pet with me?

What is meant by contemplative life?

What is meant by monastic life?

How do Sisters decide where they will live?

Is it hard being a Sister?

Do you get lonely?

Do you miss having a husband and family?

Do you ever want to quit being a Sister?

Ministry/Works:

What kind of work do Sisters do?

Do Sisters retire?

Prayer and Spirituality:

What is the "office"?

If you believe in God, why do so many innocent people suffer?

How do Sisters pray?

• I recall seeing Sisters in habits. Why don't you wear one anymore?

  You asked why we no longer wear the habit. That attire was worn by respectable widows of 17th century France, so the first Sisters of St. Joseph, in Le Puy in 1648, adopted that same form of dress. Sisters continued to wear it until after the Second Vatican Council. At Vatican II, all religious were asked to recapture and rekindle their original spirit, and for us (and for most apostolic religious orders) that meant to wear modest contemporary dress. We do wear a symbol – either on a pin or on a chain – but the essence of our commitment is much deeper than what we wear.

• What are apostolic religious orders?

  Apostolic religious orders are orders of women or men who are actively engaged in the service of others. This service flows from their life of prayer, which is at the core of who they are. Unlike contemplative religious orders, who are cloistered, that is, who remain in their convents or monasteries, the active or apostolic religious go where the needs are to be found. Both active and contemplative religious orders give their lives in service of others, but in different ways.

• How do you know if you can join the Sisters of St. Joseph?

  A woman who is interested in joining us is invited to get in touch with our Vocation Director, to explore the possibility of becoming a member of the congregation. Very basic requirements are that a woman be a single Roman Catholic with good health who desires to love God through a life of services to others and through a vowed commitment in community life. You can read more about this in our Web site under Called.

• What is the difference between a Sister and a Nun?

  The main difference between a Sister and a Nun is that a Sister is usually ministering or working among the people, while a Nun lives out her call within a convent or monastery.
  
  You may meet a Sister on the street, in a school or hospital, or around your parish. She may be wearing a habit or she may be wearing ordinary clothes. She is probably wearing a religious symbol, for example, a cross.
  
  The Nun's life is mainly one of prayer and her work is to pray for the needs of the world. An example of a Nun is St. Thérèse of Lisieux who was a Carmelite. You may find it interesting to look into other religious communities at Vocations.ca. You can also learn more about Sisters by exploring this Web site further.

• What kind of relationships do Sisters have with men?

  Hopefully, we have healthy relationships that are part of anyone's normal life. We often work with men and have men for friends. Our guideline for what is appropriate in a relationship with a man would be the same as for a married woman in a committed relationship. We have a primary commitment to God and to our community. Good friendships with men or women help us to live a healthy lifestyle.

• Why do some Sisters leave religious life after many years?

  In discerning our call to religious life, we make every effort to listen to where we can best joyfully live out our baptismal commitment to follow Jesus in love. Every life has its struggles and difficult times. If these times persist beyond life's normal challenges, a Sister may question if this is where God wants her to be. We know that God desires peace and happiness for us. It sometimes happens, as it does in marriage, that one comes to the realization that there is little hope that the vocation chosen will again bring joy and peace. If a Sister has sought help through counseling and/or spiritual direction and prayer, she sometimes comes to a decision that remaining in religious life is no longer able to bring her closer to God and the people of God she desires to serve. The Sister may apply for a dispensation from her vows.

• Why don't Sisters say Mass or become priests?

  Sisters don't say Mass or become priests because the Roman Catholic Church does not ordain women as priests at this time. Sisters frequently lead Communion services when a priest is not available for Mass.

• How does a person choose the Congregation to join?

  When a young woman feels a call to give her life to God, she starts to explore different religious Congregations. She usually begins with a Congregation that she already has some connection with through education, health care or pastoral ministry. She might feel drawn to it because of the joy, compassion, or service that she witnessed by its members. She now feels called to respond with her life as they have done.
  
  If the woman does not have connections with a religious Congregation, she will "shop around" as it were — in search of where her heart finds deep resonance. She will visit various Congregations, talk to some of the members and try to identify their charism, the spirit that moves them to consecrate their life to God.
  
  She knows that she has found the Congregation that she can connect with when she says:
  
  "Aha! This is where I feel called by God."
  
  Together with the Congregation, the young woman enters into a discernment process. During this time, with the help of a spiritual guide who journeys with her, the call to a specific Congregation may be affirmed. Eventually, the young woman and the Congregation arrive at greater clarity regarding the call to that specific Congregation. Following the initial stage of "getting to know us," the young woman will then proceed with the initial stage of formation in that Congregation.

• What is a vow?

  A vow is a promise made to God. Catholic women and men who join a religious order or Congregation such as the Sisters of St. Joseph make a public profession of the three vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. By these public vows we promise to follow Jesus who was poor, chaste, and obedient.

• Why do you make vows?

  Our vows are our response to God's call to live a life of loving service to others. We promise to follow Jesus who was poor, chaste, and obedient. We support each other in living an alternative way of life — one in which we share our resources, live a life of loving celibacy, and help one another to discover God's will for each of us personally and as a community of Sisters.

• Where do Sisters get the money to travel?

  Sisters make a vow of poverty, which means in part that any money they receive for their work is given to the community for the needs and the good of all the members. Each Sister has access to the financial resources of the community and makes her needs known for the money she requires for travel, personal items, education, etc.

• Can you join if you are a lesbian?

  Yes, women who are lesbian may join our community. Whatever one's sexual orientation is, the issue that needs to be addressed is one's capacity to live a celibate life. What is important is the ability to enter into healthy relationships with other people.

• How old do you have to be to be a nun?

  Ordinarily, we ask that a woman have at least two years' work experience after high school or two years of post-secondary education. We are always happy to meet with young women of any age who are thinking of becoming a Sister. It is possible and a good thing to be linked with the Sisters before entering a serious discernment process about becoming a Sister.

• How did you know you wanted to be a Sister?

  There are as many answers to this question as there are Sisters. In most cases, we come to a gradual awareness that this might be a path that would bring happiness and a sense of fufilment. Often we experience resistance to this call both in ourselves and in our families and friends. It is through exploring the possibility with the community and often by living with us that a woman is able to discern if life as a Sister is really the deepest desire given by God.

• How long does it take to become a Sister?

  From a first inquiry about being a Sister to the time of final vows as a Sister is a journey of discovery. It generally takes about four years from the first questioning within oneself, through discernment with the community which includes living with the community, to first vows which are made for a certain period of continuing discernment. These vows are renewed annually until the Congregation and the Sister decide that she is ready to move to the final step of permanent vows. The process usually takes six to eight years from the time she was received into the Novitiate.

• I feel called to be a Sister but I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I get sick more often but it is not life threatening and I continue a normal life but I don't know if any religious order would take me.

  For someone with a health problem who wants to enter religious life, usually the Congregation would look at the ways that the potential member can be part of the mission (that is the life and works) of the community. Usually the expectation is that a new member will be able to contribute to the life and ministry of the Congregation. While some Congregations might have specific expectations, others decide with each individual situation.

• Can someone who is entering a religious community also be engaged in studies at university at the same time?

  Generally, vocation directors encourage potential members to complete university or college and/or to have some work experience before joining a religious community. Having some life experience helps a woman make a more informed choice in the matter of a vocation.

• Can a person who in her past has made many wrong choices, e.g., used illegal drugs, still enter a religious community?

  God does not hold on to our past deeds but supports us as we make a choice to change our life and to choose a new way of living. So, a person's past does not affect the invitation to explore religious life as a Sister.

• How much contact does a Sister have with her family?

  A Sister has contact with her family as much as the relationship requires. When one marries and begins to raise a family, her contact with her first family moves to a different level. She concentrates more on the needs of her present family: husband and children, or partner. It is the same with a Sister; she is usually busy with ministry and community responsibilities. She keeps in touch with her family by attending birthdays, weddings and other family events.

• What does it mean to live in community?

  As women religious, we choose to make the significant group in our life the Sisters of St. Joseph. This means that the context in which we make decisions and live our life is our community.
  
  I live, for example, in a community with three other Sisters. Over supper, we share about our day and what may be happening in our families or in the larger community. Then we pray the Prayer of the Church together. Because this time is important to me, I make every effort to be home for supper unless I have a meeting or other commitment. We also set aside one evening a week to spend a longer time together, usually for prayer and sharing about God's action in our life. We share in the cooking and cleaning and household duties. For me, to live in community is a source of strength and support for my vocation because all of us are committed to the same way of life as Sisters of St. Joseph.
  
  There are challenges in living with other women who have grown up in different families with different circumstances. These can be enriching because they help me to broaden my perspective and learn that there are many ways to approach one thing.
  
  To live in community is not always easy, but it is gift.

• If I join, may I bring my dog or other pet with me?

  Although most Sisters appreciate the value of pets, animals are a concern for the Motherhouse and our other community houses for many reasons. Our lives, especially those of our "newer members" are very busy and not always in the same house or place during the Novitiate time. Therefore, coming with a pet would not be an option for a beginning Sister.

• What is meant by contemplative life?

  Contemplative life is a life characterized by solitude and prayer. Such a life opens a person to contemplative prayer that is prayer which focuses on the presence of God. As Sisters of St. Joseph, we are called to a life of contemplation in action, that is, a life which includes a mystical dimension as well as involvement in apostolic ministry.

• What is meant by monastic life?

  Monastic life is a form of religious life in which persons take vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. It began in the fourth century. Both women and men founded and lived in monasteries. The best known monastic founder was St. Benedict. Hildegarde of Bingen was an influential monastic woman. Monasteries were centres of learning and prayer. Monastic life and work is arranged around the divine office.
  
  Religious Congregations such as the Sisters of St. Joseph provided a new form of religious life which was not confined to a monastery. Sisters also take vows but unlike monks and nuns who live and work in a monastery, we are actively involved with society, particularly with persons who are excluded or marginalized.

• How do Sisters decide where they will live?

  The decision on where to live is not one that a Sister makes in isolation. It is made in dialogue with those in leadership in the Congregation. Things that enter into this dialogue include the needs of the Congregation, the needs of the ministry, and the needs of the individual Sister. By the vow of obedience, the Sister is open to where she will be led within the Congregation and this includes where she will live.

• Is it hard being a Sister?

  We are Sisters because we find joy in our vocation to be a Sister of St. Joseph. At times, there are difficulties in our life, just as there are in any life. We have lots of opportunity when we become a Sister to see if we, as individuals, find it hard to be a Sister. If we find such aspects of our life as celibacy and making decisions in dialogue with the community do not enable us to feel more free but rather are very difficult for us, this is probably not our vocation. We can then choose to search for another path before committing to final vows.

• Do you get lonely?

  Everyone gets lonely sometimes, especially when, for example, a parent dies or good friends move away. Because we live in community, there is usually someone we can talk to and this helps.

• Do you miss having a husband and family?

  Yes, that is a desire most women have. When we discern that our call is to religious life, we choose to love God and others by responding to that call. Love continues to be central to our lives. Women who would make the most loving and dedicated wives and mothers also will become the most loving and dedicated Sisters, serving God and the people of God — out of l

• Do you ever want to quit being a Sister?

  We all have times when we consider leaving. But overall, we are glad we stay. Being Sisters expresses who we are. We are happy and believe this is where we can best love God and other people.

• What kind of work do Sisters do?

  Actually, a Sister works almost anywhere depending on the needs of the area, her talents and professional qualifications to help meet those identified needs. You will find Sisters ministering in parishes, hospitals, elementary and secondary schools, universities, prisons, soup kitchens, L'Arche homes, Meals on Wheels, cancer clinics...... The list is forever evolving as new needs are identified and Sisters are available to minister in these areas.
  
  Our charism to bring unity and reconciliation to our world motivates our ministry. For example, our ministry is to bring justice to our world, to alleviate suffering, to foster the rights of women and children. These are not easy tasks but they are important.

• Do Sisters retire?

  As women who have dedicated their lives to reaching out to those in need, Sisters cannot stop being God's instrument at a certain age. While they often retire at sixty-five from their professional ministry/work, they continue to be people for others but in new and different ways.
  
  Keeping in mind their health and past experience, they now find novel ways of responding to their 'dear neighbour.' Some Sisters who have limited physical abilities engage in phone ministry. This provides contact as well as support for people experiencing difficulties in their life. Others help people in developing countries. Older Sisters can become spiritual mentors for young people. Some Sisters spend time visiting their own Sisters who are receiving nursing care.
  
  Retirement is not only 'doing' but also 'being'. Sisters now can discover new ways of being with the Lord in prayer and solitude. During their wisdom years, Sisters often uncover hidden talents that are now given time to surface. These can include art, poetry, or music.
  
  While most Sisters, as they age, experience diminishment, they continue to see how they can minister to the people of God. Retirement is not so much looking at what a Sister can no longer do but an opportunity to look at what is now possible.

• What is the "office"?

  The office is also called the Liturgy of the Hours. It is the public prayer of the Church as a whole. The office is composed of hymns, psalms, readings and prayers, something like the first part of the Mass. It celebrates the seasons and feasts of the year (Advent, Christmas, Epiphany, Lent, Easter, Pentecost). The office comes from the early Church's practice of gathering for prayer together at morning and evening and at three-hour intervals during the day. Priests, religious and many lay people pray the office. Some groups chant the psalms. Others recite them antiphonally, that is with the group divided into two sections. Sisters of St. Joseph pray the morning and evening office. Generally we recite the evening office together. We sing a hymn and include prayers for the community.

• If you believe in God, why do so many innocent people suffer?

  This is a very difficult question. Many people have tried to answer it. We believe that God loves every creature. God has given us freedom. Some suffering is the result of the misuse of freedom. Human beings make bad choices, which cause suffering to ourselves and to others. God does not interfere with nature but God is with us in our pain. For Christians the death and resurrection of Jesus teaches us that love is stronger than suffering and death.

• How do Sisters pray?

  Our prayer is a response in faith to the loving initiative of God, who is always drawing us to closer union. We participate as often as we can in the celebration of the Eucharist, and set aside a extended period of time for individual prayer daily. One of the ways we pray is to open ourselves to the word of God in scripture, and reflect on our lives in the light of the gospel. As well, we pray the Office, morning and evening, and make a yearly retreat of at least a week.